if all dreams are the opposite of reality,
then mommy's is not really a dream.
she dreamt of me crying on my bed.
it was weird because i was crying.
how miserable i was in her dream,
but all she did was walk away.

apologies for the sudden change of url.
due to some unforeseen circumstances, i was forced to change my previous cute sounding url to the current one.
another apology for any inconvenience caused. =))

halfway at work today, my eyes developed a swell and had to take halfday to see a doctor. what happened was it just swelled up an hour after i took my painkillers this morning. well... not mine exactly. i was too desperate trying to ease my menses cramp, (because i had forgotten to bring my own medicine), i took pills that does not belong to me. I thought initially that my mascara could be the culprit for that swell, but my colleagues suggested that it could an allegy to some drugs that i've taken earlier.
The doctor's diagnosis states that i could be allegic to synflex - a drug to reduce pain, fever, and pain or stiffness in injuries & menstrual cramp, or the allegy may even be to the whole class of drugs that it falls under. She gave me an injection (there's really nothing else she could have done given the condition that i can't take anymore drugs at the moment), and advised a stop to naproxen from this moment onwards. And also to check for naproxen contents in future prescriptions by other doctors.
there goes another fifty bucks. but i will sleep better tonight. my nightmares which have been going on since a month ago, have subsided since i went for my piercings. the instant pain relieves me, as much as the injection today. weird is, my dreams get worst as i grow older. it gets more complicated and tensing. In every dream, i will be facing problems which i can't solve and all the time, i can't seem to get out of those situations in my dreams.

this is tiring, because your mind doesn't rest while you're dreaming and my work revolving around payment and calculations requires no careless mistakes and sleepyness on the job. in the end, it's like not getting any rest, day and night, at all. many things are happening at this time and i'm not sure how to cope with them. I have no idea who to talk to, and how i should go about leading myself down to the right solutions. whenever i close my eyes, i could almost immediately picture myself entering a very dark forest, whether i'm on the bus or just taking a short break from my monitor at work, the image settles in almost automatically. sometimes, i'm just standing there facing the forest, about to enter it. the feeling is more like having to enter a place knowing fully well that you are going to get lost somewhere inside. the last thing you do before you step in, is look around to see if there's anyone by your side, and seeing no one in sight, you gather up all your courage and went on alone into the forest. these (fear) are the worst feelings someone could ever have.

"If I had low self-esteem, I would probably be starving myself right now."
- Tyra Banks, (on being criticised at 73kg.)

Holding anger is a poison. It eats you from inside. We think that hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harm we do, we do to ourselves.

- Mitch Albom, The Five People You Meet in Heaven

Saturday. 07 July 2007.

Finally got a feel of how my dream car feels like.
It's huge, and really high and beautiful. Sitting in it makes me love it even more now.
Just in case you're wondering which car,
it's the Lexus SUV. ;)
(shld be the RX300 if i'm not wrong.)

Also attended my colleague's wedding.
It is an auspicious day - even on the lunar calendar. I heard.
But even among high demands of hotel ballrooms today,
he was lucky enough to get the lunch slot.
heard that Copthorne King's Hotel, one nearby, is holding 13 lunch/dinner in a day.
Busy day for the chefs, indeed.

We have new 7 wonders today.
The Pyramids of Giza in Egypt.
Great Wall of China in China, Taj Mahal in India, Christ Redeemer in Brazil, The Roman Colloseum in Italy, Petra in Jordan, Machu Picchu in Peru, Chichen Itza in Mexico.
Just in case you're counting eight,
you and i made no mistakes.
The Pyramid is a changeless wonder. It has been casted inside as an irreplaceable wonder while the others were nominated among 21 wonders.
http://www.new7wonders.com/

went swimming with Gigi last evening.
it's been so long since i last swam and i was really tired after work.
but it was fun ;)
we hadn't been working out lately anyway
in addition, no warm ups before the swim and blah,
guess that's the reason why we both took turns getting cramps, hee!
of all the things, swimming is still one of my favourite.
would go no matter how tired i am =p
talking about this, my skipping rope actually snapped like a month ago.
so i haven't exactly been exercising for a month too.

yea... getting bigger la.